YES, is a positive word. Yes, stands for and signifies everything good about human life. NO, on the other hand, stands for what is negative. Yes sounds sweet, but No sounds harsh. However, in reality, and our daily lives, or let me put it this way, in my daily work-life philosophy, I use No more than Yes and I like No far more than Yes. Let me elucidate with real-life situations:
1. IN BUSINESS: 'Focus' is the most essential ingredient for any task, work, or person to succeed in any endeavour. It is a subject unto itself, which is not taught in any of our schools, colleges or even in Institutions that offer Professional Degree courses in Law, Medicine, and Business Management, and consequently never put to practice.
Saying yes to a party, a movie, a project, a meeting, or a request binds you to something more than what you thought it would take from you. The more things out there to which you answer YES, the less time you will have to focus on what you need to do.
Then again, people start or work on several different ideas and businesses at once. It can be disastrous and nobody says it better than Steve Jobs, who said:
People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully. I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things I have done. Innovation is saying ‘no’ to 1,000 things.
Therefore, in daily life, I like to use NO more often than YES.
2. IN PROFESSIONAL WORK WITH COLLEAGUES AND ASSOCIATES: I do not work with colleagues who are lazy, lethargic, short-cut lovers, perennial procrastinators, and those who do not like attention to detail. I usually refuse to buy the cliche surrounding teamwork unless my teammates share my work ethos. I prefer working alone.
I expect male colleagues and associates to respect women, be completely dignified in thoughts, words, and actions towards them, and never venture in a direction that is not gentlemanly. One wrong move and I ensure that there will be hell to pay.
3. IN WORKING WITH CLIENTS: NO to anyone who does not offer me trust. In other words, if there is a trust deficit, there is no question of working together. NO to 'you do the work first, we will pay you later'. It does not work with the Movie theatres, where we all pay before watching the movie and even if the movie turns out to be a dud, we decently leave the theatre without asking for a refund. We are Professionals and we expect to get paid. NO to rude and uncouth behaviour with my colleagues. NO to any kind of sexual misconduct with my lady colleagues or associates (there will be hell to pay). In other words, NO to a whole lot of people whom I do not wish to see as my clients. This leaves a lot of room for YES to the select few who understand our work, respect our work, and value our time, commitment, skills, and dedication.
4. IN PERSONAL LIFE: I believe that as a person I should and will follow all the laws of the land. When it comes to personal life, that of mine or anyone else's, we are entitled to vast freedom of choice in deciding our moral code and adhering to it. I cannot enforce my moral code on anyone else, and I will not. All the same, I will not allow anyone else to enforce their moral code on me either. I call it ' the personal code of svadhrma'. I will not judge anyone whose moral code differs from mine. I will never be judged by anyone either. The Indian Penal Code (or any law of any country where one is), on the other hand, applies to one and all and will be adhered to, whether or not one likes it.
This means NO to a lot of potential friends, acquaintances, and fair-weather companions. It means NO to a lot of get-togethers, parties, and picnics. But it also means YES to a select few who will be life-long companions.
Therefore, it is NO that deserves a closer look and wider use in daily life to make it more meaningful as compared to the much-favoured YES.
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